Blida Department of English: Free Stand to Stand Free
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my fist topic

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my fist topic

Post by messi on Thu Jul 08, 2010 5:36 pm

I will try to post this story. read it and tell me what do you think!
can i participate in the competition of the forum with something like this story?
( I donn't have a title for it )
so here we go:


"

It is Thursday, the usual wedding day in Algeria. It is also the dream day of Yacine and Lamia.

Everyone is so happy, they waited this day for a long time. The invited people are gathered is a big wedding , the music is on, women are dancing, children are playing , everyone is overwhelmingly happy for them

The bride is in her room with her mother, her sisters and friends…She is an extremely beautiful young girl with an amazing smile and her face was glowing with happiness .

Everyone were looking at her in her beautiful , elegant white dress..everything was going in a perfect way, until something happened…. The bride screamed :” I CAN’T SEE , I CAN’T SEE!”

Her mother and sisters gathered around her and tried to calm her down, they believed it’s just the result of stress and fear but the bride kept saying “ I CAN’T SEE , I CAN’T SEE!”. They called the groom who tried to calm her down, but they; finally, realized that the bride really lost her sight.

Suddenly the place was in a mess , people are taking and asking about what happened and rumors started to spread among them but The husband who loved his bride very much insisted that he will marry her no matter what happened.

They called the Imam to give her some kind of « رقية « ….but it did not work . The Imam said that bride is hit by an « eye » and it is a very strong “eye” that it can only be repealed by the death of his or her owner.

Days and years passed and the bride learned to live with her new condition, and the love of her husband helped her to adjust. They now have two children and they are living

until one morning, she woke up able to see again .she jumped of joy and the first thing she thought of is to call her mother and tell her the great news but when she did she was told that her mother is dead

THE END"



and remember I just finished my first year in English departement..so be nice
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messi

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Re: my fist topic

Post by Thewolf on Thu Jul 08, 2010 7:05 pm

It is very nice story, may God bless you.
But you dammaged the wedding...
He was honest Husband
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Re: my fist topic

Post by Guest on Fri Jul 09, 2010 3:02 am

So "the owner of that strong eye" is her mom since she returned her sight by her death!!

Guest
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Re: my fist topic

Post by schneller on Wed Jul 28, 2010 5:30 pm

Heard about it, but I wonder if a non-Arab would understand the "eye" concept, which is typically ours! Very Happy
Nice story, lad! Keep on

P.S. Off the record, this ain't the story you can win a contest with! I'm just being honest chuchoT
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Re: my fist topic

Post by sayyadmahir on Sun Dec 26, 2010 12:00 am

Westerners understand 'bad eye'.

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Re: my fist topic

Post by messi on Mon Dec 27, 2010 2:26 pm

U hope I can say that I have improved in my writings since the time posted this story, but the truth is I've not.
but I'm still trying!
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messi

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Re: my fist topic

Post by mimi cici on Mon Dec 27, 2010 3:44 pm

it's a nice story,but i wish that if it can be longer than this...
If you can try to rewrite it,and make it full of actions to create suspense..
That's just an opinion.

Carry on man



jouliya
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Re: my fist topic

Post by NANA on Mon Dec 27, 2010 8:41 pm

well really nice one i liked the story
keep going
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